Another Set Of New Year’s Resolutions I Intend To Keep

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Three, Two, One, Happy New Year! Welcome to 2021!
Although we all know that turning the page on a calendar does not make the events of 2020 magically disappear, at least we can put it them the rear-view mirror. Now that we can begin writing 2021 on our checks (anyone else still using a checkbook?), it’s time to take stock of our lives and look at things we can do differently this year to make ourselves better people.

As the clock strikes midnight and we reflect on the past year, we vow to do better in our personal lives by making resolutions for the new year. I don’t like to make unrealistic demands on myself. Over the years, I’ve come to understand my limitations. I temper my resolutions accordingly. And what better way to stick to your resolutions than making ones you know you will keep?

Although more than 70 percent of people fail to keep their resolutions by the end of February, I have maintained mine. I won’t lie to you. I’m just as weak as the next guy, and although we spend New Year’s Eve reflecting on the previous 364 days, I also vow to do better as we begin the new year.

If you are a faithful reader of this column, you will know that in previous years I have vowed to not: lose any weight, join a gym, eat healthier or learn a new skill. I’ve also kept my promise to procrastinate more, spend my children’s inheritance and refrain from binge-watching.

I am happy to report that although 2020 was a year like no other, I was still able to make good on my resolutions:

No More Fake Food
I did not eat anything pretending to be something else. After trying the Impossible Whopper in 2019, I vowed to not eat anything advertised as “incredible” or “amazing.” That includes things like “egg-beaters” or “I can’t believe it’s not butter.” If it’s not butter, what is it? Mission accomplished.

More Relaxing, Less Sweating
This turned out to be easier than expected, considering we were forced to shelter in place for most of 2020. At 63, I’ve officially retired from doing physical labor. I have money, I can hire people to do things.

Social Media Will Not Influence My Decisions
Although I continued to use and monitor my Facebook page, I stopped believing anything I read. It’s mostly nonsense with a few Seinfeld videos thrown in.

Knowing what we know now about COVID-19, here are some resolutions I know I will be able to keep in 2021:

Watch More TV
Although I believe I might have set my own personal record for television watching in 2020, I vow to break my personal best this year. Without being able to attend live sporting events or concerts, why even leave the house? Besides all the channels Verizon offers, I also have Netflix, Hulu and Amazon Prime. Also, I get in additional reading by having the “closed captions” on at all times.

No More Retail Shopping
Besides food and home improvement stores, I don’t see myself going back to the mall to shop. Like Target and Bed Bath and Beyond, every retailer I use, even Walmart, will deliver my purchases at no cost. I just completed my first Christmas without ever stepping off my front porch.

No More Buttons Or Zippers
Unless I must go back to the office a few days each week, I’m not going to buy any new clothing with buttons or zippers. This will help me better prepare for another year of strictly casual wear. Does anyone know a good seamstress if I do have to go back to the office?

Make More Time For My Friends And Family
With all the uncertainly that 2020 brought us, I’m not taking any chances. Neither should you.

I wish all of you the best of luck in 2021 as you in your quest to keep your resolutions. I know I’ll keep mine…

 

Paul DiSclafani, a Massapequa resident, is a Press Club of Long Island award-winning columnist (2018, 2020) and an Anton Media Group contributor since 2016.

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